A guy walks into the church and says:

God, please! Please let me win the lottery. My family is so poor; my feet are swollen; my children are sick; my horse is dying; my rice is stale; my house has a leak; my phone doesn’t work; I can’t get on the Internet; I’m tired and need a break.

Silence.

The man leaves, only to return the next week.

God, please! I must win the lottery! Please God. You must help me! Please let me win the lottery. My family is poorer; they’ve cut off a leg, my children are dying; my horse is dead; my rice is rotten; my house has two leaks; my phone got stolen; I still can’t get on the Internet; I’m exhausted and don’t know if I can go on.

Silence.

God? Are you there God?

A booming voice comes from above:

Will you at least buy a ticket?

So one mask says to the other mask while hanging out at the park the other day:

My friend’s wife’s cooking is so bad, I broke a tooth on her coffee.

So the other mask says:

If a parsley farmer is sued can they garnish his wages?

Then the other mask says:

Say, so you know when you’ve drank too much coffee?

The other mask says: No, when?

When you forget to open candy bars before eating them.

The other mask says: Dude, you got to get out more often.

(The above text is clear evidence I spend way too much time with kids. Wait, wait, just one more! Click here to see one of my favorite cartoons - like ever!)